[Monitor beeping....]
[Muffled breathing...]

Her body fell into a deeper abyss. Hey eyes felt jaded. She fell into a deeper state of trance. Could it be all the anesthesia that made her feel this way? From the infinitesimal peek between her eyelashes and skin, she could see a faint image of her parents. They looked older, worried, and almost lost all hope. They did not cry though. Was she dead? Was this how it feels when the soul leaves the body? She couldn’t tell anymore.

What felt like an eternity sleep inertia, she awoke feeling drowsy. It took some time for her to adjust to the dim lighting in the room. It did not smell chemical; in fact an aroma of lily incense whiffed up her nose. As she was about to get out, she realised, there were cords hanging down for the nurses call button and the IV solution needled carefully into her vein. There was an electronic machine sitting on a cart with odd wires leading from it, a privacy curtain hanging from a track on the ceiling. Was she alone? She looked around and found multiple get well soon cards on her table and a bouquet of flowers. She couldn’t muster up the courage yet to know what really happened and how did she end up this way….

After a turmoil with the chords, she managed to drop her feet down. It felt chilly. She touched her back to find wires glued all the way up up to her chest of the hospital gown. She thought for a minute about what an embarrassing garment had been invented that has no back and lets every human know what the underwear looks like. She wrapped the blanket over her and pulled open the curtain. She was alone. It was a considerably cozy room with just one window with a mini blind on it, and a view of the roof of an adjoining building. She started to walk towards the door.

Barefoot, she felt a gush of cold wind run all the way from the bottom reaching her spine as she was about to push the lock open. She found an empty hall, an empty reception, and a fully functioning vending machine. She felt strangely lonely. She decided to walk to the end to find a nurse around who could answer the least of her question to why she was here; what had really happened to her. At the end she found a waiting hall with bright lights on. She could sense movement, but there was stillness all around, As she walked towards the glass window, she could see a doctor speaking to her mother. Her father paced across with his arms across his waist and eyes so dry from the excessive crying. She could not hear a thing but tried to lip read. From as much as she could interpret, her mother continuously asking, “Would she live on? How many more days do you expect Doctor?” And the doctor trying his best to pacify her. She was furious. She couldn’t stand to see them so sad. She angrily opened the door of the waiting room to find the lights suddenly get back to its mellow shade with occasional flickering. There was no one around. She fell straight on the ground. Her consciousness leaving her body in a fraction.

She finally woke up with a startle: panting and sweaty, to find herself in her parents room. Wrapped around her was her mother’s favourite stole and her fathers ashtray with a crinkled decaying cigarette bud. The TV left carelessly on, the door unlocked, she felt the same stillness around. It had been three months since she lost them to COVID-19. She got up, tied her hair in a bun and started penning down how she felt about this, hoping to rid herself from the recurring dream of taking her away instead. There was nothing she could do now.

A very Happy New Year to all my fellow bloggers!!!

With what we all know of and agree with, 2020 is better left in the past. With a scurry of the slings and arrows of life’s misfortunes, all of us have or are battling with grief, anger, frustration, or maybe completely happy to be at home with the privileges of comforts offered to us. I too, tried to think of the positive wind of change this could bring to me; a chance to introspect deeper into my desires, but unfortunately, my job surpassing and draining my energy during the weekdays, left the weekends for me to unwind and recharge. I apologise for the mellowness in my story, but you know how it is. You flow with what relieves you.

Do let me know how your year went and probably what have you added to the bucket list of 2021? Stay safe everyone and keep shining ❤
Much love to all from oceans across!!

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